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Today, May 17, 2011, marks our EIGHT MONTH waitlist anniversary!
I am always excited to hit the 17th of every month because that means we are another month closer to seeing the sweet face of our Caroline Faith! I will admit, this month is a little harder knowing that our agency has just extended the expected waitlist time to 18 months.
It's hard to imagine being on the waitlist for 10 more months. It's a big reality check to think that we may not even be halfway through our time on the waitlist. And last night, I started to feel a little discouraged about it. It hurts my heart to think of waiting so much longer to know about our daughter.
But as I was walking early this morning, God spoke so clearly to my heart. I heard Him ask, "Do you trust Me?" In my heart, I responded, "Yes, Lord, you know that I trust You."
Then I heard Him ask again, "Do you REALLY trust Me?" Again, I responded, "Yes, Lord, I trust You fully to bring her home."
His response kind of surprised me. I clearly heard Him say, "Then start living like it. Start living every day like you trust Me. Show me that you trust Me."
Wow. I was instantly convicted. When I start to get discouraged and complain, then I am, in a sense, showing God that I don't completely trust Him. When I am filled with complete trust in my Lord and Savior, then there should be no room for complaint and discouragement.
I am trying to do better about pouring out my heart to the Lord everyday. As soon as the feelings of doubt or fear arise, I pour it out to Him. When the overwhelming emotions of the wait become too much, I lay them at His feet. When the tears began to fall, I go to His arms. When the questions fill my heart, I ask Him. He's a really big God, and He can totally handle it.
And the amazing thing is, when I pour out all these feelings to Him, He replaces them with His hope, His peace, His mercy, His comfort and His love. And then my heart can rest. Only in Him, can I truly rest.
Yes, we may have a really long wait ahead of us, but God has a purpose in it. He has the perfect plan for our daughter in Ethiopia. We trust Him, and we're going to start living like it!
"Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge." Psalm 62:8
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19 comments:
WOW! Thank you for the encouragement this morning!! You are an amazing child of God! Blessings to you and your sweet family!!!! :o)
I completely agree about pouring out our feelings to the Lord. I have been trying to hold it all together for a while now and last week I had what can only be described as a "meltdown". I cried and cried and just gave the Lord all of my worries. I don't understand how He does it, but He replace my worry with peace. Thank you for sharing your heart. Praying blessings for you as you daily trust the Lord!
I have been convicted recently about the need to rejoice in all circumstances--and pouring out our hearts is a sure way to find that joy! Thanks for encouraging me, friend. (Although I must admit that when I saw the "8" photo on my google reader, I thought it was your new waitlist number. . . .)
Praying for your thankfulness in all things given to you, so that you worry less and see the blessings around you as you move step by step closer to Caroline Faith, and closer to Him.
Your blog is so encouraging, I just love it.. your faith, and your heart! Praying for you all!
I am passing this post on to all my friends who are waiting:)
May we all have the peace and fearlessness that comes when we are filled with complete trust in our Lord!
Closer and closer!!! Tomorrow is our 7th month!!! Can't wait until we both have our referrals!!!
sweet times that are changing your faith journey forever.
Awesome. This week marks our 11th month of waiting. And lately I have been so content with that. I love that God knows exactly what we need at all times, and even though He is so big and we are so nothing, He still loves us enough to speak to us on our own level. Blessings to you all as you continue to wait on His timing! :)
Love your heart and how you pour it out and how you share what the Lord is speaking to you because it is for so many....so, thanks for being vulnerable and sharing.
God gave me this exact verse yesterday! I need to pour out my heart to Him more to show Him I trust Him and for Him to grow that trust too. Thanks for the encouragement!
Alison, I think your email has been hacked. I got a bizarre email from you today about a weird weight loss trick.
I hope your wait doesn't go all the way to 18 months!
Look at it this way... in one month, you'll be halfway there, and in two months, you'll be on the "downward slope"... and maybe you're already halfway there. Maybe you're past the halfway point... you won't know until you bring her home. And then, this time will seem so far away, and you'll be able to see better how God worked in your life today.
Praying for you guys, and I'm where you are at too in different ways. Just started Priscilla Shirer's Jonah study on a "life interrupted" - it is so good and encouraging!
Sweet post. You're so right. In hindsight you'll see the beauty of the way God used waiting to prepare for hearts for His purpose and perfect plan for you guys. We learned this as well. It wasn't easy, but now we're praising God we followed HIS plan and not our own!!
Blessings as you wait upon the Lord!
so encouraging! thanks for sharing!
Really needed to hear this. I feel Him saying "Do you trust me?" a lot and it's so easy to just say "Yes, Lord.." and leave it at that. But to start living like it...wow. Thank you Alison!
Thanks so much for sharing these thoughts about trust...I definitely needed to read this today. I will think about this often. Thanks!
you are one month closer to meeting her how exciting!
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