HOPE for 2013.

Well, I think the best way to share about hearing God's word for me for 2013 is to just share what I wrote in my journal on the morning of January 2, 2013 right after a walk on the beach...

As I was walking along the beach this morning, I was praying (out loud!) to God and praising Him- and of course, praying for our baby girl!

It was a chilly, windy, cloudy morning with a chance of rain in the forecast.  I was thankful to have a chance to walk along the beach one last time before we left today.

Around 7:30 am or so, as I was walking and looking out at the cloudy horizon over the ocean, I saw this unbelievably gorgeous long light of the sun break through the horizon and shine along the horizontal line of the ocean.

It was beautiful!  It was like God's glory breaking through the gray, stormy clouds.  The one word that kept resonating in my heart was HOPE.

Because of who God is, I have hope.  Because of Jesus coming to earth as a baby, I have hope.  Because of the sacrifice of the Son on the cross, I have hope.  And I have hope for our daughter this morning.  I know that God has great plans for her that I can't even imagine!  

Thank You, Lord!

This picture is not from that morning of January 2nd, although I do wish that I had one to remember that moment.  However, I took this picture the first morning we were at the beach on December 31, 2012.  The picture quality is not that great because I have no idea how to photograph the sky, but I think it still gets the point across.

You can see the dark clouds and the rain coming down out in the distant ocean, and then right at the shore the sunlight was just starting to shine through the darkness.  I feel like that is such a beautiful picture of HOPE.

There can be storms, clouds, and darkness all around us, but because of God's love and grace and who He is...there is still hope.  Hope is always there ready to shine out of the darkness, but we have to choose to let it.  We have to make a choice to live with hope.

The enemy has already begun to attack my heart with fear.  I have struggled with being afraid to hope.  I am scared to even think that 2013 might be the year we bring our daughter home...because what if it's not.  I am afraid to hope that we might see her face soon...because what if we don't.  What if I get my hopes up and then I get disappointed again?  How will I handle the emotions that come along with that?

But I know that these are lies from the enemy.  I know that this is not how the Lord wants me to live.  He wants me to live in hope...not false hope, but HIS hope.

His hope doesn't disappoint because I can rest in the knowledge that His ways are perfect. (Romans 5:5)

I can hope in Him because He always answers my prayers. (Psalm 38:15)

My soul can be free from discouragement because I hope in Him and He helps me. (Psalm 42:5)

I can rest in the wait because of my hope in Him. (Psalm 39:7)

When everything thing around me seems unsure and changing, His hope is sure and steadfast...an anchor for my soul.  (Hebrews 6:19)

I don't have to fear the unknowns because He has good plans for us...plans to give us a future and a hope.  (Jeremiah 29:11) 

The Lord is my portion, so I put all my hope in Him.  (Lamentations 3:24)

I can choose hope even when I can't see and with perseverance wait eagerly for it.   (Romans 8:25)

So, in 2013, I am choosing to HOPE in Him and in His Word.  As I was typing this, I just realized that our verse that we have claimed over our adoption journey to Caroline Faith contains the word hope...

"Now faith is being sure of what we HOPE for and certain of what we do not see."  Hebrews 11:1